9Lives of Helen
Helen was my best friend since the 9th grade. badass, wild, hilarious but with the hausfrauness of her German mom who cared for me too. Back then teen boys believed that girls with big breasts loved sex so the top endowed Helen was greatly sought over. Of course even that one version of being popular, was better than nothing. Except nothing was what it became. As per natural order she “got a bad reputation” which by association I got one too. until I bombed out. Turned out boys didn’t like me in that way because I was skinny and read books.
Helen mimicked all of Lucille Ball’s voices “Oy Vay, already” and facial expressions (Ehh) She made me laugh more than Lucy ever did. She had a clear singing voice with a coach who taught exercises like belting do re me, while laying on the floor. Helen as far as I know never performed. Still, she wrote in my copy of Valley Stream Cadet Class of 1954 yearbook, “We’ll go on in life you as an artist, me as a singer.”
Even before HS graduation, Helen commuted to a cheap beauty school just over the line between our Nassau county and gritty Bronx, where the “houses are attached,” a term that distinguished Bronx from the desired suburbs. Upcoming graduates from the beauty school were to be competing in a hair styling contest. Helen invited me as one of the models. A young man (he was older and put in airs like he was too qualified to be there) imbued his artistry on my hair into the perfect do.
Unfortunately the judge said that parted right down the middle with split bangs winging flat on either side was the exact wrong style for my long face. My stylist glumly accepted second prize. The judge then awarded first to a puppy dog, Helen’s buddy who her coff stylist. At the last moment, Helen had swept her hair over to one side as a joke between her and her buddy.
A word about the judge- Don. He was famous. Well, his brother was anyways - Tony Bennett - everybodys heard of him, right? So when Don the brother rolls through the door dressed sharp, naturally, all the students burst into a capella of “I Left My Heart in San Francisco.”
As it turned out, Helen worked most of her adult life as an accountant mostly for the same guy. Time was harsh on Helen- popular, husbands, childless, cheaters, stroke. We found each other after 65 years - she in a wheel chair, me with a cane. Our hair looked great!
Helen mimicked all of Lucille Ball’s voices “Oy Vay, already” and facial expressions (Ehh) She made me laugh more than Lucy ever did. She had a clear singing voice with a coach who taught exercises like belting do re me, while laying on the floor. Helen as far as I know never performed. Still, she wrote in my copy of Valley Stream Cadet Class of 1954 yearbook, “We’ll go on in life you as an artist, me as a singer.”
Even before HS graduation, Helen commuted to a cheap beauty school just over the line between our Nassau county and gritty Bronx, where the “houses are attached,” a term that distinguished Bronx from the desired suburbs. Upcoming graduates from the beauty school were to be competing in a hair styling contest. Helen invited me as one of the models. A young man (he was older and put in airs like he was too qualified to be there) imbued his artistry on my hair into the perfect do.
Unfortunately the judge said that parted right down the middle with split bangs winging flat on either side was the exact wrong style for my long face. My stylist glumly accepted second prize. The judge then awarded first to a puppy dog, Helen’s buddy who her coff stylist. At the last moment, Helen had swept her hair over to one side as a joke between her and her buddy.
A word about the judge- Don. He was famous. Well, his brother was anyways - Tony Bennett - everybodys heard of him, right? So when Don the brother rolls through the door dressed sharp, naturally, all the students burst into a capella of “I Left My Heart in San Francisco.”
As it turned out, Helen worked most of her adult life as an accountant mostly for the same guy. Time was harsh on Helen- popular, husbands, childless, cheaters, stroke. We found each other after 65 years - she in a wheel chair, me with a cane. Our hair looked great!